Every day in December, many people celebrate “Advent”. According to this site,

Advent means ‘Coming’ in Latin. This is the coming of Jesus into the world. Christians use the four Sundays and weeks of Advent to prepare and remember the real meaning of Christmas.

Why Christmas

I’ve decided to participate in this mindfulness practice, by blogging each day. Doing so will diligently reminding me of what Christmas is and how I need to act. This will encourage me to check my attitude, heart, and intentions.

---

Blogmas Day 1:

I love fragrances that remind me of wonderful memories. Here are a few that will send your home in the right direction❤️

Reposted Chapter 20: Drug Changes Change Rose

Things fell apart. Drug 4L had been added to drug 3S after the seizures during the holidays. At first drug 4L made Rose mean. Getting her schoolwork done was a battle. Either she would not or could not concentrate. Were these changes due to the new drug, the new homebound situation, or the seizures? Her ear infections continued, so antibiotics were frequently in the mix.
We kept records of all her drug dosages and combinations, along with seizure descriptions on a chart. We couldn’t keep all of it straight unless we wrote it down. The months were a blur of seizures, side effects and sickness. I read books about epilepsy and researched epilepsy drugs and treatments. It was all so confusing. How could we help our Rose if we did not understand this disorder and the effects of its medications? I felt helpless…

I don’t want accolades
or a standing ovation
I don’t want to be applauded to the very echo for being the best Mom but, Sometimes I ask myself if I’m doing it right
I ask myself if I’m not clutching you too tightly lest I squeeze you
I also ask myself if my grip is too firm because I don’t want you slipping away from my hands

I ask myself if I have fed you well enough or you still want some more
I’m scared to move away to do other things in fear that you open one eye and find an empty spot beside you
I’m afraid to even blink because I don’t want to miss a moment

I want to see you smile in your slumber
I want to see your toothless gums as you yawn
I want to see your face change every day as it takes…