“Becoming fearless isn’t the point. That’s impossible. It’s learning how to control and work through your fears. That’s the point.”

Past traumas and fears will often show up, and impact, our current relationship. Fears of betrayal, rejection, abuse, abandonment, not feeling safe or loved, or the fear of being lied to, and unable to trust.

So, what can we do to help with these fears?

1. First, we need to ask ourselves: “What am I most afraid of? What am I terrified is going to happen – maybe not right now – but at some stage in the future?”

Try to really get to the core issue. Try to summarize it clearly and succinctly in a sentence of two.

2. Next, allow yourself to feel the fear. To really feel it. In all its intensity. Don’t try hard to repress it, or to push it down inside. It wants you…

“Letting go can feel like a tremendous struggle, even when you know it is absolutely necessary for you to live a better life. Breaking with the past is literally a break, an end, a refusal to return.” – Unknown

Letting go … It sounds so easy … Like opening up your hand … And watch your balloon float very gently to the sky.

But letting go of trauma, or a bad relationship, is difficult, heart-wrenching. It is painful and complex.

And here are a few reasons why this might be the case:

1. A sense of continuity is built into our life. We expect certain people to always be there, and to always be a part of our personal narrative.

Hence, when that story’s interrupted, or is ripped away from us, it has a huge impact on our psyche and our world. We feel disoriented. Disconnected from ourselves.

2…